Do You Believe What You See?

I was talking with a friend this week about the holidays. She said that Christmas used to be a big deal in her family while she was growing up. There were lots of people around, lots of events, and lots of kids. Years later, after some family members have left the physical world, some have moved away from their home town, and some have divorced, Christmas has become a much quieter time. She said she somehow feels guilty about not being able to create those kinds of holidays again.

Nowadays with social media, the Hallmark movie channel, and holiday advertising, we are bombarded with images of big, joyous holiday celebrations. We only see the images that will improve how we think of the people who post on social media. We only see the images that will encourage us to buy those extra decorations or Christmas gifts. We see the movies that show a perfect resolution to a problem. We don’t see the work, preparation, and stress involved behind the scenes.

One thing I’ve learned over time is that the more you see something and hear something, the more you will think it’s normal. So when the cycles of life and family turn to smaller celebrations or quiet holidays, we think that it’s not “normal”, because it’s not what we see out there in the world.

What you see from the outside is one thing, but I think that what really matters is what you feel on the inside. The holidays are a special time of the year. Where can you find joy? You find it wherever you are, by focusing on the things that make you feel the best. Everything can be both “good” and “bad” depending on how you look at it. If you don’t have lots of events, focus on how much time you have to do things that you may not have time to do the rest of the year, and be grateful that you’re not frantic like some of your friends. If you don’t have lots of people around you, focus on the wonderful qualities of those that are, and be grateful you don’t have to host a houseful of people.

What do you think of this? Do others think of your holiday experience as “perfect” when it doesn’t feel that way for you? Do you wish for holidays like you had in the past? Are you happier with the holidays you have now? Leave a comment!

Until next time, remember… We are all magnificent.